Who Should You Spend Time With After Getting Sober?

You do not want to be surrounded by people who only tell you what you want to hear or don’t care enough to let you know when you are taking unnecessary risks with your sobriety. You need people who will speak up and tell you when you are doing things that could harm your path, like spending too much time focusing on the negative, skipping therapeutic interventions or meetings, or otherwise getting distracted from your focus: staying sober. Honesty from others helps you to be honest with yourself and to course correct when little things threaten to throw you off.

2. Ready to Hold You Accountable

There may be times when you are going to be dishonest with yourself or with others and make choices that are in clear violation of your commitment to a balanced and healthy recovery. You will need someone in your life who will follow up with you and hold you accountable, the kind of person who will notice when you are not at the meeting you both attend three weeks in a row or that you stopped showing up to the coffee place where you usually meet them with others in recovery. This person may notice things you don’t, or they may make you pay attention to a situation you are trying to avoid. In both cases, this person can be invaluable in helping you to get back on track before you relapse.

3. Working on Recovery as Well

When you spend your time with other people who are actively working on their own sobriety, even if they are struggling with different aspects of their new lives, it can normalize your experience and be a constant reminder that you are not alone. Conversely, if you spend a great deal of time with people who have a “normal” relationship with alcohol or who continue to use and abuse illicit substances, then that way of life may continue to seem like the most comfortable route and may trigger a relapse. The more time you spend with other people in recovery, the more likely you are to hear something every day that will help on your path to sobriety.

4. Encouraging

Spending time with positive people – those who try to look for the silver lining, avoid gossip, and are fun to be around – can improve your mood and help you to find levity in life rather than getting stuck in a cycle of negativity and depression that can lead to a relapse.

5. Supportive

Staying sober isn’t easy. You will have days when you are in a bad mood for no reason, feeling hopeless and unsure of why you started down the road to sobriety in the first place, and otherwise not a good friend to the people who care about you most. It is good to have someone in your corner who will support you no matter what comes your way – and by extension, theirs – and who will be there for you as you grow in recovery.